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Thursday, March 02, 2006

Nick of time

Phew, I made it. Finally had a temp rise today after 6 days of O signs. Had EWCM at the weekend, +OPK on Mon and cramps on Tues. When there was a temp drop yesterday, I was a bit anxious, as I always have a temp rise the day after +OPK, the same day I get my O pains. So the egg took its time after getting its orders from the LH, nothing wrong with that. Well, I'm sure Google could come up with several reasons to panic, but I won't go there.

So I am relieved, and once again looking forward to the 2ww. During the brief period yesterday when I considered that I may not ovulate at all, I imagined what it would be like to have a "real" fertility problem. Not LPD, not reduced sperm mobility, but an almost 100% guarantee that sex alone was not going to result in pregnancy. It's a whole different level of infertility, and it scared me more than I would have expected. It makes me feel like I'm just playing at being infertile, an imposter amongst the real sufferers. One thing I know though, my emotions are not imaginary - the anger, the bitterness, the disbelief, the disappointment, these are all very real to me. I suppose what I realised yesterday is that I still have a huge amount of hope, and am fairly confident that our problems will not stand in the way of natural conception. I expect every cycle to be my last, and always embrace Hope with open arms (until I give her a kick up the arse around 10dpo).

So here goes my final 2ww.....

6 Comments:

At 6:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whew... I'm glad your egg finally decided to make as appearance - you really didn't need that worry! It's great that you've managed to find your optimism again too. Fingers crossed.

xLizzy.

 
At 6:46 PM, Anonymous lisau said...

Hey Feebee,I am in the midst of a tea party here...Helena has piled up mounds of fragile things around the computer.So..I will take that broad hint & be brief..Hurray for O & for the hope it brings for new life &joy,
Lisa

 
At 8:13 AM, Anonymous Treelo said...

Hi honey, just checking in to see how you're doing.Delighted the egg arrived at last, one worry off the list. Fingers crossed for you chicken.

 
At 3:20 PM, Blogger Feebee said...

Thanks girls!

 
At 8:29 PM, Anonymous lisau said...

Happy Weekend! Looks like I will O early again as my OPK lines are halfway there day 7. So by Monday/Tuesday I will probably be waiting again. Off to finish by bookclub book. Night out with the girls..weehaa!
Lisa

 
At 12:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where did you find it? Interesting read here

 

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