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Sunday, June 03, 2007

Falling down again

I thought this IVF cycle would be easier to deal with as I don't expect to get anything out of it.


Because I have no hope, I am finding every day very hard. Not physically hard - I could do the injections in my sleep - but mentally I am very down, and the sadness and bitterness is overpowering.

Can depression kill a cycle? Will my ovaries know I don't trust them?

It's day five of stims and there's nothing stirring. I'm guessing one or two follicles and another big decision to make.


At 10:33 AM, Anonymous Artblog said...

I have been reading but haven't had time to comment, sorry!

Hope is so hard to muster when it doesn't come from the heart, and I often think depression can affect a cycle at least that's been my experience.

All I can give you is a virtual hug, I hope its something :(

X Artblog

At 3:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

F, have been offline for a bit.
So sorry to see that things are once again fucked up.. I wish I had some fabulous words of encouragement; instead I will just send you all my love.

At 4:33 PM, Blogger Adrienne said...

I know it's hard, especially coming so close on the heels of your recent loss. Try to find some, though. While it won't "kill" this cycle, you are giving your body an extra hurdle to jump. Pick a hopeful mantra and meditate on it. Do some yoga. Take a mindful walk. And when those voices of doubt start crowding your head, forcefully tell them to go away, they don't know what they're talking about, and you're not listening to them right now.

We're here for you Feebee, and we know it can happen for you. Take some of our hope for your own.

At 5:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi F,
I know you will recover your will and hope, I dont know anyone who has persued their dream with as much determination and strength as you have, mind yourself, I hope you feel better soon,

At 12:54 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I will send you lots of hope.

At 11:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Feebee, hope is all we have, when it feels like we have nothing left to give...I, hope you get some.

I doubt not having any would kill your cycle, but if you can muster up even a teeny tiny bit it might just help you this cycle.

You've been so strong and positive, you are a real inspiration...big hug that Lady Hope finds you once again.
Thinking of you.

Dee 1 (MM)

At 5:47 PM, Blogger Feebee said...

Thanks everyone, you give me the strength to keep going.

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