Proper pregnant?I am pregnant, I'd even go as far as to say that I am proper pregnant. What is proper pregnant? It's when the lines on your HPT get darker over time and then after about a week, you stop testing and start counting down the days until your first scan.
I am 4w5d. I said that 5 weeks was the holy grail, that if I could reach that milestone then maybe I would be in with a chance. Please, ahem, allow a lady to change her mind. Six miscarriages can tend to make one quite confused in the head. And I have become a CRAZY LADY. To quote my husband, "insane". And there is little chance that two more days will change that.
I have to believe that I still have a chance but no, I just can't get my head around the idea that you get pregnant and then you have a baby. I know other people do it all the time, they conceive and then what seems like a few weeks later, they have a baby - a real, live newborn baby. The thought is beyond a dream for me. But the alternative does not bear thinking about.
So I am going to close my eyes and put my fingers in my ears and sing a happy tune for as long as I can. No more testing, just breathing - in, out, in, out.....